Seeking Wonder in the Land of the Lost

Evelyn Jack at a Pinups 4 Charity event

When did being an adult become synonymous with being serious?

We celebrate “acting like a grown-up” like it’s the ultimate achievement—responsibility, stability, seriousness. Pay your bills on time. Keep a straight face at work. Have fun only in socially acceptable ways: a drink at the bar, a seat at the game, dinner at a trendy restaurant.

And yet… if you look around, you’ll notice something: no one is having FUN. Sure, they’re enjoying their microbrew or expertly plated meal, but they’re performing, filling time—they’ve lost their sense of wonder.

The Harm of Rejecting Play

There’s a passage in scripture about putting down “childish things” to make room for spiritual enlightenment. Somewhere along the way, we've twisted that to mean abandoning the very magic that makes us human.

When we deny ourselves play—real, whimsical, silly fun—we’re not leveling up. We’re cutting off a connection with our own “spirit”. And the consequences are very real:

• Stress skyrockets 

  • Play releases endorphins and reduces cortisol. Without it, stress lingers like a fog.

• Creativity shrinks

  • Play invites imagination and flexibility. Without it, thinking gets rigid, boxed in.

• Relationships weaken

  • Humor and shared joy are the glue that holds intimacy together. Without them, bonds thin.

• Emotional immaturity hides in plain sight

  • True maturity isn’t rejecting joy—it’s knowing how to balance responsibility with delight.

The Benefits of Staying Playful

Psychologists now recognize what spiritual traditions have hinted at since the beginning of civilization: play isn’t childish. It’s sacred.

• Adults who play are less anxious and more satisfied with life.

• Play builds resilience, helping us practice how to handle life’s inevitable frustrations.

• Creativity at work thrives when play is present.

• Relationships deepen when joy is shared, because laughter serves as a spiritual glue.

Play isn’t frivolous—it’s human. It’s spiritual.

Why Adult Fun Got Stuck

So why do we equate adult fun with booze, bars, and ballgames?

History and marketing:

• Men’s leisure was public and loud—saloons, clubs, sports.

• Alcohol got tied to masculinity, then to mainstream “adult fun.”

• Bars became the default “third space” because they’re profitable.

• Meanwhile, quieter, creative, and wonder-filled spaces used by more diverse groups faded from view (or were never taken seriously).

The result? A narrow definition of fun that leaves no room for magic.

I’ve been sober for nearly a decade, and only after I quit drinking did I realize how much joy I’d been outsourcing to the bottom of a wineglass. Without booze at the center, I rediscovered miniature golf, water slides, camping under dark skies—and felt more alive than I ever did in a bar.

Wonder Is Everywhere (If You Look for It)

The truth is, wonder is still here, waiting for us.

• Creative play: making mosaics, painting nights, cooking classes, book clubs, knitting/crochet clubs, pottery classes.

• Cultural play: museum nights, comedy clubs, local theater, cabaret, drag shows, trivia, unique pop-ups.

• Active play: hiking or biking groups, adult sports leagues, dance classes, indoor/outdoor adventures (kayaking, paddleboarding, rock climbing, bouldering, parkour), fitness classes.

• Joyful play: karaoke (sober or not), community music nights, escape rooms, movies in the park, miniature golf, go-carts, carnivals.

Not one of these requires a pint glass in your hand to be fun.

The Land of the Lost (and Found)

Somewhere along the way, we put down our toys, locked up our curiosity, and called it “maturity.” But for many of us, we never replaced those things. We have been living without wonder, joy, or spiritual enlightenment. And that bargain has left us brittle.

Reclaiming wonder isn’t regression—it’s resilience. It’s remembering that life isn’t meant to be endured; it’s meant to be lived.

So here’s my invitation, my challenge, my plea:

Put down the performance of adulthood. Stop measuring fun by what looks good on Instagram or what society deems “appropriate.”

Instead—

✨ Laugh until your stomach hurts.

✨ Do something ridiculous just because it delights you.

✨ Believe in something impossible—like the floor is lava.

✨ Choose curiosity over cynicism.

✨ Pick wonder, again, and again.

Because the land of the lost? It’s not a place. It’s a state of mind.

And wonder isn’t just how we find our way back—it’s how we move forward. 💛